The Hoosier and the Kentuckian
As told to His Grace (and Quasimodo) by FrolloFreak
Well, there was this Hoosier, sittin' on the Indiana side, fishin' in the Ohio River. He must've had luck on his side 'cause he kept catchin' fish after fish. He'd already caught a nice bundle of fish and was working on his second.
On the Kentucky side, a poor Kentuckian sat and sat, with nary a nibble. Look at that Hoosier over there; he'll drain the river of fish before I even get a nibble. Wonder what his secret is...
Then the Kentuckian called out across the river, "Hey, neighbor! I see the fish are bitin' mighty good over there! I ain't caught a fish yet!" The Hoosier peered out across the river and shouted back, "Well, why don't ya'll come over here? They's bitin' real good where I'm a-sittin'!"
The Kentuckian was surprised. Imagine that...a Hoosier...helping a poor ol' feller from Kentucky...and I thought Indiana folks all just made fun of us...
The Kentuckian replied, "That's mighty neighborly of you..but I can't get across the river."
The Hoosier shouted back, "Do you have a boat?"
"Nope, ain't got no boat."
"Well, can you swim?"
"Nope, never learnt how!"
The Hoosier thought long and hard. Then he came up with a brilliant plan.
You know, I really hate to do this, but...they all fall for it every time!
"Say neighbor!", the Hoosier shouted across the river, "Why don't I hold my lantern up and you walk across this here beam of light." The Kentuckian looked puzzled, but thought, that sounds like a good idea!...Hey! Wait a dadburn minute!
The Kentuckian flew into a rage. Durn those dadblame Hoosiers...they do it every time!
He yelled across the river, "Do ya'll think we's all stupid?! Why I ain't been more insulted in all my life!"
The Hoosier couldn't believe his ears. "Don't mean no harm, friend! Just doin' a neighbor a favor!"
The Kentuckian shouted back, "Don't do me any favors! I'm sick and tired of folks makin' fun of us! You think we's the dumbest bunch of goobers on God's green earth!"
"I didn't say you was dumb!", shouted back the Hoosier.
"Oh yeah?", shouted back the Kentuckian, "Why, if I was to walk on that there beam of light, as soon as I got halfway across, you'd put out the light, and I'd fall in the river and drown!"
FYI: FrolloFreak heard this gem from her sister – The crazy one!
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