I know I already have a disclaimer page explaining copyright, content, ratings, etc. But I thought why not go one step further. So here's one more page of disclaimers for this site.
No part of this site shall be copied, distributed, or reproduced in any fashion without permission from site owner. All rights reserved. Void where prohibited by law. Violators will be prosecuted. Do not fold, spindle, or multilate.
Keep out of reach of children and pets. May cause dizziness and drowsiness. Do not drive or operate heavy machinery while surfing this site. May cause excitability in children under 6 years of age. If you are taking a MAOI or SSRI, do not use this product without first consulting a physician.
Contents are flammable. Keep away from heat and open flame. May cause eye and skin irritation. Please dispose of properly.
The U.S. Surgeon General has determined that surfing this site may be hazardous to your health. Not responsible for lost or stolen articles. For external use only. Use only as directed. Your mileage may vary.
These manuevers performed by professional driver. Do not attempt to do this yourself. Are you kidding? You'll put your eye out!
Checks or money order only. Do not send stamps or cash. Credit denied. No C.O.D. Be sure to write account number on check.
Do not use near water. Electrical shock may occur. May cause suffocation. Do not use in cribs or playpens. This end up.
Do not try this at home. Do not cross yellow line. Slippery when wet. Curve ahead. No U-Turn. Do not enter. No motorcycles or bicycles. Shirts and shoes required. No parking after 6pm. Do not park: bus zone. No right turn on red.
Keep hands on safety bars during entire ride. All circuits are busy. If you are trying to make a call, please hang up and try again. You must first dial 1 or 0. No new messages.
To speak with a customer service representative during business hours, please press 1. To use the automated system, please press 2. Please enter your PIN then press #.
Do not use in eye area. May cause skin irritation. A tingling sensation may occur when first using this product. To avoid hair loss, skin and eye injury, please read the enclosed instructions. Do not use on eyelashes or brows. May cause blindness. If product gets in eyes, flush with cold water and consult physician immediately.
Unauthorized use may result in fines up to $10,000 and/or up to 20 years imprisonment.
I thought you'd like that. ROTFLOL! Now return to the Home Page OR This Page